And you're a white, and you're uh you're the wife. Um, I'm not here to get you. I'm not here to talk bad about you. I'm not here to make you feel bad. But I am here to preach the text. If in today you find a rub, I think that's okay. Um I uh we were talking about this yesterday, and uh, I believe my my wife was like, uh, if anybody's feeling any kind of way, just worry. Just don't forget that next week the husbands are mentioned. So, you know, it's kind of like everybody's gonna get a little bit of something to think on and probably be challenged by in this series. But what I want to endeavor to do is in these five points, hopefully, hopefully help us get to somewhere. All of us, especially if you expect to be married at some point, you are married, or if you have found yourself walking through divorce or any of that. I think that everybody today can get something out of what we're talking about, but especially wives. Please, please, please, if something rubs you the wrong way today, don't just get mad about it. Maybe ask God, what are you doing there? It has been the best question for me to ask when I don't like something that I'm hearing in the scriptures. And I'm going to endeavor hopefully to preach something that will be helpful, not just something that might make you feel awkward. Usually when I hear people preach this text and I hear people talking about this text, when they hear wives submit to your husbands, it immediately that word submit brings out feelings. Come on. Now, whether you're a wife or not, if you hear the word submit to somebody, come on, church, it brings up feelings. If someone is to walk up to you in the middle of the street and say, hey, you need to submit to, and they just name somebody, you'd be like, back off, Bucco. I don't know you from Adam. You're not going to tell me what to do. And we need to start with that. Before we start with what Paul is actually commanding and bringing to families, specifically the marriage, specifically wives, in this part of the text, we need to kind of deal with issues and difficulties of submission.
That's my first point today. A lot of times authority is only talked about if something's gone wrong. I've witnessed this in the church. I have a lot of pastor buddies, me and Trace, you've heard us talk about this. We meet up with a group of pastors from around this community, interdenominational group of people. There's Baptists there, there's non denominational people there, there's church, the church of God's represented there. We have all these different pastors. And you know what is amazing to me? How many of you in the recent past have heard of a pastor and a moral failing from a pastor? Just raise your hands real quick. Participate with me real quick. Right. Do you know how many pastors you have heard of that haven't had a moral failing? No, you haven't. Because they're like, and I'm by the way, I'm gonna use a football analogy real quick, Trace. This is yeah, I know. But wait just a second. Let me make sure I get it before you get excited about it, okay? I've watched my middle son play football now, and I'm trying to understand this game. I've been around it, I've watched it. I'm not a big football fan. I don't know what these things are that are going on. I'm not that kind of man's man. I'm not a football watcher. Um, but what I've noticed, as Declan's been playing football, is nobody talks about the O line unless they're doing a bad job. The only people that they talk about on offense is the quarterback and the receiver or the running back. They are never talking about the lineman unless they're doing bad. Oh man, our offensive line is awful. You never hear in football talk, I have not heard it yet. Man, our O line is crushing it. I just don't hear that. We've got a great quarterback, we've got great receivers, you just don't ever hear about the O line. Let me tell you something about authority. Most of the time in society, in the church, in marriage, you don't hear about when it's being done good. You only hear about when it's being done bad. I've got pastor friends of mine that are living in the fruit of what a pastor did thousands of miles away from them in a congregation that no one knows their names, but people in their congregation are like, that's exactly why we need checks and balances. This pastor's been serving you faithfully for 20 plus years. And now all of a sudden there's this distrust with the pastor. And I've watched the same thing happen in marriages. In fact, what I will tell you is our culture right now is so anti-man, it is crazy. There is so many people who want men to be absolutely burned at the stake. Now, guys, it's not without good representation. There are a lot of fellas out there that are not doing a good job of holding the standard of Christ likeness. I would even encourage you, real quick, dads, husbands, please don't let the only time that your kids see you being um. Boisterous or out, you know, just out loud and passionate, the only time be when you're out coaching third base or or when you're watching something on TV that gets you worked up. Please don't let the only time they catch you in passion being outside of times like when we were singing that song a second ago, what was stirred in my heart was: I hope that that kids are watching their parents and they're going, my dad acts just as crazy in the church as he does at third base. Because he's not going to let God only not get that crying out of his heart only at third base. He's going to give it to him when they're in the house of God. That they're going to they're going to lift up holy hands. They're not just going to shake their fists at the TV. Amen. So, husbands, you know, we need to, and we're we're going to talk about this. Next week we're going to get into this. But husbands, we we have a lot of bad representation out in culture. And it may not be your fault, but the fact is we're we're kind of living against the grain right now. So there's a lot of issues. A lot of times the only time you'll talk about authority or hear about authority is when it's gone wrong. This whole Cornell university situation is just one more thing on top of the pileup of a divided nation on a subject matter that that is not open and shut, shut case. It's situations like this that get brought up, they only fuel the side your own. They don't help people talk. Uh, they don't help people have discourse. Like me and Shannon were just talking about this right outside, right outside over that wall right there. We're just talking about how we don't really know how to talk things out. And now things like Cornell have become men don't care about women, men don't listen to women, women have things that they need to say, and they've been hurt, and they've these beat things have happened, and no one will believe them. And on the other side, you have these guys are being accused. What if we wait for the story? We don't know, it's alleged, and don't you hear it even in your own heart? Well, I've picked a side. I've picked a side. And that's a really bad example, a low shelf example. I don't think that's a great example of how all this works out. But will you hear what I'm saying? There are too many examples of it going the wrong way. So that when we come to the scriptures, it's hard to get to the scripture because we have to come to all the issues that we're dealing with personally. When you heard about the Cornell story, what side were you on? Did you pick a side immediately? And now listen, I don't fault you ladies. Uh uh, you know, I've heard I've heard it once, I've heard a million times. No one will listen, no one will hear, no one will care if a woman stands up and says X, Y, and Z. They won't be trusted, they'll be treated like it doesn't matter. And when a situation like Cornell happens, then it's like, oh yeah, see, they didn't even listen, or they didn't do this, or they didn't do that. And it just becomes a back and forth, and the issue never gets resolved. Because here's the reality: your side, what your opinion of it is, you're not at Cornell. You're here. And you're where you are. And so then how do you deal with that? You've got all these things.
And in our culture, one of the bigger problems with authority is people misconstrue the difference between, especially in the scriptures, the difference between authority and power. I want to tell you something. If your husband is godly, he will want to be the best representation of authority that there has ever been for you as a woman. He will not try to grab power because power is about dominion, it's about dominating, it's not about serving. Christ did not come to be served. He is the greatest. We just sang three songs declaring his greatness. The greatest human that has ever walked the planet did not choose power, he chose service. So, fellas, that's our mark. But then the problem comes well, how can you trust man? How can you trust that authority? How can you do that when our world is saturated? So we have that issue and the difficulty of what submission looks like around us. Then we've got this moment, the second point would be you've got this moment in scripture and culture where they meet together. Scripture is often asking us to do things that don't match the current preference or the world around us. This is what is difficult about being a true disciple of Jesus Christ. The way you believe will not always be accepted, even in the Bible belt. You're not safe in the bubble in this southern part of the United States. Because to be a disciple does not rest on whether or not you attend church services, right? It rests on your obedience to Christ. And I'll tell you, there are a lot of people who, in their following Jesus, fit into the culture. Jesus said, You're in the world, but you're not of the world. There should be something that makes you like a city on
a city on a hill that cannot be Quoting Matthew 5:14 hidden. And how would you do that? Is it through your church attendance? Is it because you know Bible verses? No, it's it's whether or not you live in accordance with what Christ commands. Is he your Lord? Do you follow him?
And when we see uh scripture hit up against culture, It gets messy. It gets really, really messy. I want you to listen to what
Romans 13, 1 through 2 says. This one's hard for people that are very politically motivated. If you follow a lot of politics, this one might be hard for you too. Whether you're pro-Trump, anti-Trump, whether you don't care, whether you're libertarian, you're Democrat, you're a Republican, it doesn't matter. I want you to hear what the scripture says. Let every person be subject to the governing authorities. Does it doesn't in yourself, don't you immediately get rubbed? Well, wait a minute. That guy's corrupt. That guy is that they're not doing right. They're not doing that. We really, as the church, have to learn the difference between honoring a person in the name of God versus treating them like they're God. Trump is not my God. He is the president of these United States, and therefore he is my president. People don't like that. He's not my president. Yes, he is. You live in the United States. You don't have to like him, but you are subject to this governor. Why is this important? You might say that's a political statement, Jonathan. No, it's not. It's a scriptural one. Just listen to the rest of the verse. It says, For there is no authority except from God. Now that hurts me because I don't like a lot of politicians. There's a lot of thought in the church. The church should never talk about politics. Of course we should. Jesus talked about what goes to Caesar. Paul talks about what goes to Caesar. Jesus stood before governors. Paul stood before governors. Of course we should talk about politics. But not about how we vote, but about how we honor authority as that God has instituted it. And if we're going to rebel against authority, then we might be in danger of rebelling against God. Now, you might have to square that away in certain different areas. I don't have time to talk about all of that. That does not mean that we ascribe to things that are unethical, immoral, or unbiblical. If my government comes in here and says, you cannot sing those songs, guess what Jonathan's gonna do? All hell, King Jesus. My government's not gonna tell me that I can't worship God. We'll have to be a Daniel generation. That might come upon our generation. I don't know. It might come upon my youngest son Rowan's generation. I don't know. But if the government tells me something against God, well, that's where I don't have to obey. That's where I don't have to say. If they're asking me to do something immoral, I don't have to do that. Why? Because I'm honoring God. If they ask me to do something unethical, I don't have to do that. Wives, if your husband is asking you to do something immoral, unethical, or that's unbiblical, God says you don't have to obey that. You don't have to submit to that. Okay? The problem has probably not been, though, that the husband wasn't leading in a way that was moral, ethical, or biblical. It might have just been because it's very difficult to submit to authority in general, and therefore very difficult for a wife to submit to their husband. If all authority is from God, then when it's done right, it's holy, it's good, it's always for benefit. It's not for the harm of that person, it's for the benefit of that person under authority. If you listen to the rest of that verse in
Romans 12, or
Romans 13, excuse me, it says, And those that exist, he said, all authority is from God, and those that exist. Have been instituted by God. Therefore, whoever resists the authorities resists what God has appointed, and those who resist will incur judgment. That's a tough scripture. Again, you don't have to submit to unbiblical, unethical, or immoral things. But when we're not submitted to authority, it may give us a picture of us not being submitted to God. That's something that I would like for everyone in here to hear. Because every one of you is being asked to submit somewhere. There are three areas that usually we see authority and three areas that God has designed where authority flows or works itself out. The government, the family, and the church. Somewhere you're being asked to submit. You may not be married. Well, where are you submitting to the governing authorities in our country, uh, your city? Maybe the authority in your workplace, even? Where are you submitting in the church? It's hard because we realize our authority or our God's authority on us sometimes comes through people around us. And we just want to be submitted to God on an island. I want to tell you something. The next time it rubs you the wrong way that you're being asked to do something or to go along with something with someone who is over you, who is responsible for you, someone that you answer to. Those are some popular ways of saying it. Maybe in your work workplace or maybe in your family or again, maybe in the government. I want you to ask Is this problem, is this thing that I'm facing internally right now, if God was to ask me to do it, would I do it? And if you immediately go, of course I would, then just do it. Is that easy? No, it's not. But my point is make it straight up and down. Don't make it so messy. Sometimes submitting to authority has a lot to do with just checking in on whether or not if God asks you to do it, would you? And if you're if you're honest in your life, you know what? I don't know if God asked me to do it, I don't know if I would do it. That's at least honest. And you can at least bring that before God before you eventually submit to the person God's put in front of you.
Let's talk about the motives in submission. Number three. Now, the reason I want to talk about motives is because that's ultimately where submission comes from. Sometimes you've done this, I've done this. When I submitted to my parents, I submitted maybe in action, but not in heart. I've talked about this before, you maybe heard this. I don't just want my kids to take out the trash. I'd prefer them to do that without stomping their feet the whole way there. Do you hear the cry from the Holy Spirit to say, you know, I'd love for you to obey without stomping your feet the whole way there? And um, and because I am talking in the scriptures talking to wives, I want to talk to wives. If there is a place and a rub in your marriage where you are unwilling to kind of surrender to the way that things are going, the question would be: can you not only obey, can you not only submit, but could you do it as unto the Lord? It's very difficult. There's a few of the phrases from the scripture there in Ephesians. Let's just look at them, three of them. Statements that help us kind of frame the motives of submission unto the Lord. The husband is head. Ooh. I'm gonna tell y'all a story about something where I got my hindquarters chewed out. I guess me and Trace and her wives kind of got chewed out, but uh as the church submits to Christ, these phrases help us look beyond our uh situational obedience to something that is transcendent. It goes beyond us, it goes beyond who we are. Um, one time uh Trace was being invited uh to speak. At a conference and uh and he had been to this conference before and uh he invited me and Jennifer. Aaron was Aaron was going and so invited me and Jennifer to go, and so it's kind of like us getting to hang out and be buddy buddy. And while Trace was doing all the spiritual stuff, me and Aaron and Jennifer would go hang out and do the non-spiritual stuff, and then we would we would get Trace and we would go do it. But the the last year, maybe the last year that Trace was invited, might have been because of this. I don't know. But Trace is invited and and uh and they asked, So, since we were coming, would we be a part of a panel and talk about being married in ministry? I was like, oh yeah, sure. That sounds great. And uh, and we got into this panel, and somehow something got talked about where I believe it was Jennifer, talked about me being the head, and and she was gonna submit to what I said. And I want to say real quick, I haven't brainwashed my wife, okay? You better say this when we're out there, make me look good, all right? Uh, we have a conviction about what the scriptures say, and and I'm not domineering. I'll give you a great saying, too, um, that's really good for helping with marriages. Glenn Schaefer said this, and I've loved this, and and it's it's how me and Jennifer exist in our marriage together. And move together and make decisions together. And it is this I will, I will listen to your insight if you'll listen to my oversight. I am not asking my wife to just go along with stuff. What do you think? How should we? Sometimes, even with things with the church, I'm like, before I say this, like, what do you think about that? When you hear me say this, what do you hear? Her insight helps me lead. And my oversight helps keep her safe. I'm going to talk to that in just a second. But before we get there, this conference we were at, Jennifer said something about headship. He's the head. I'm well, lady popped up. She said, we do not ascribe to headship here. Well, I've never really heard that before. Y'all got to understand, as far as theological terms, there's a lot of stuff that we still learn sometimes that we I've never heard. Like I've never heard the term headship theology.
As Christ is the head of the church Quoting Ephesians 5:23, so the husband is head of the wife. Because in this particular denomination that we were speaking to, There wasn't just equality in rights, there was equality in role. And we don't believe that here. And this is why. Because the scriptures don't say that. I don't want you to think that I've got a beef against you ladies, and I think you shouldn't be. I mean, if anything, I'm probably more preferenced towards let the ladies do everything. Some of them do it better than the fellas. Y'all remember the old Nike commercial? Anything you can do, I can do better. I'm like, yes, you probably could do it better. But the question isn't, can you do it better? The question is, how has God designed it? It's not about male chauvinism, it's about how God designed it. How did God design the man and how did God design the woman? And if we can be honest, in our 21st century culture, we don't like a lot what the scriptures say about traditional values. Now it's been pulled over into the political realm, and now we tie these biblical principles to conservative values. And listen, I'm not here to say again about politics, but now it's like those biblical values are tied to a party. And so now it's like, oh, the Republicans are that way and the Democrats are not that way. We're not here to talk about that. We're here to talk about what the text say? How has God been doing it? And have men done it wrong? Amen. Of course they have. Has the church gotten it wrong? Yes, but just as I have had to learn, I would ask our church to be this way too. You're going to have to recover some of the baby you threw out with the bathwater. When I first helped, we helped kind of got together and we planted this church. I was a lot of things that I was against and I didn't want. You know what you want to know why? I saw them done wrong. And when I saw them done wrong, I kind of made a vow. We'll never do that at Move Church. Guess what? We do a lot of that at Move Church now. You want to know why? Not because those bad things didn't happen and I forgot them, or you know what it did? Those bad things helped me shape a better view of what the Bible actually says. And guys, people are going to do stuff wrong. It doesn't mean that the principle is wrong. I walked away from that conference thinking, holy moly, I didn't know that we were that controversial. I didn't know that our belief was so controversial. And I'll be honest with you, the reason I never thought that is because I'm not domineering over my wife. I don't demand my wife do anything. What we're striving for is for us to serve one another. What are your motives? Can you submit, as Paul says, is unto the Lord?
Wives, submit to your husbands Quoting Ephesians 5:22. And also it makes a clarification your own husbands. Ladies, you are not ascribe to submit to someone else's husband. You know, they're like, what sense does that make? You're not one with them, you're one with your husband. And that doesn't bring such a beautiful picture of then the church and why the church should be unified? Because the scriptures say that the church is one. Just as the husband and wife are one, and this we'll talk about this next week. The husband and wife are together as one, the church, the bride of Christ, is one. And we want to we don't want to tear each other apart. So how do we serve to find unity and grace, to love each other, to serve each other, to be for each other? And how do we do that is unto the Lord? If you were to be tested today and someone said, I want you to tell me how you're submitting to the Lord, where would you go to prove it? If you're married and you're a woman here, I want to tell you a place that you should be able to go immediately to your marriage. I'm submitted to my husband. That does not mean I'm a doormat. Because that's what a lot of people think submission to authority means. Whatever you say goes, master, Lord of the house. I'm not Jennifer's Lord, I'm her husband. I'm called to love her soul. Not manhandle her to you better do what I say. You see, that is not the nature of Christ, and therefore your submission to your husband should look like that is submission to Christ because He is head of the church. And
the husband is the head of his wife Quoting Ephesians 5:23.
The fourth thing would be a submission in today's world. Let's look at it. Can a woman, this is a great question. Can a woman be and still be empowered if she's submitted? Because in our world today, those seem like the opposite. If you're a woman and you submit to your husband, you're giving up your autonomy. No, you can't hear me, woman, hear me roar. You can't do any of that because now you're in subject to your husband. Can a woman in the 21st century church be empowered and be submitted? I think the answer to that is yes. But I think it we have to look at our culture and our history for just a second and see something that has impacted all of us, whether we believe this or not. And I'm going to talk about something that initially started out as something good, but like all things in the world, that good thing turns bad. Why do good things turn bad? Because man's heart, and I say man, I mean mankind. Mankind's heart is bad. Are guns bad? No. People are bad. Is money bad? No. People are bad. Is the church bad? No. People are bad. Is authority bad? No. People are bad. Is submission to authority bad? No. Was the women's liberation movement bad? No. But it turned bad really quick. To now the fruit of the women's liberation, which was supposed to help women have equal rights, has now turned into the fruit of feminism, which does not care about equality, it cares about power. Now, again, if you leave here and you think Jonathan is the most male chauvinist man, you just have to get to know me better. I'm just not, I'm just not like that. But I have seen how feminism has turned into not let's make sure all women are empowered and seen as good, but how can women have more power and men be seen as evil and wrong? This is not biblical. Listen to Paul's words. When he says, when we come to Christ and we come to the cross, there is therefore now no more slave, no more free. There is no more male, there is no more female, there is no Jew, there is no Greek. We all become equal at the foot of the cross. Why? Because every one of those targeted groups are filled with sin. And at the foot of the cross, what is every man, woman, and child, black, white, slave free, Jew, Gentile need? At the foot of the cross, they need liberation from their sin. So when Paul says there's no more male or female, he's not saying gender doesn't exist, sex doesn't exist. He's not saying that. What he's saying is that does not determine your right or your ability before the cross. In the ancient world, women were treated as less than. And in America and its founding, women were still treated as less than. And some brave women and some brave men started fighting for women to be treated with dignity. To not be treated as subservient, but be treated as equal in worth, in dignity, in value. And if you're a woman in here today, I want you to hear it from Move Church, from our authority, from our leadership. You have dignity and you have worth, and God loves you. He'll forgive your sins just like he forgives anybody else, and there's no hierarchy at the foot of the cross. You can have the same grace, you can have the same gifts, you can have the same abilities in so many ways, but the cross does not change God's design for the role. At the foot of the cross, you get equal rights. You can bust into the throne room of God. Just like I can, at any point you want to, and ask God for anything. Not because you're special, but because Christ was. It's not, you won't get gained access because you're male or female. You don't get closer to God because you're male or female. You get closer to God because of the person Jesus Christ. But Jesus' death on the cross does not erase God's order in the home and God's order in family. The movement that came from the women's liberation movement, once it began to move towards equal rights, it moved over into we don't just want equal rights, we want equal roles. Does Jonathan believe every woman should be at home barefoot in the kitchen? Your only role is to do this, is to do that. No, no, no, no. Get you a job. Do what you do this. But that's not your role. That's your right. You can do those things. You see, we we've we've gathered that if you if you have this conservative biblical view of marriage, it means you ought to be at home. You never get to leave the house. You're Susie homemaker. And some of you women are not Suzy homemaker. You wanna you just want to get out there and tackle stuff. You know? Okay? That was just for Sammy, okay? You you're you're you're you are autonomous. You are strong. You are able. But when you come into the family, God says, I don't want you to lose that, but I want that role to make sure that you don't become independent of God ordained way of doing things. Ladies, you can be strong and you can be independent. Just don't be independent of God's order in the family. We went from women's rights, women's liberation, women's empowerment movement. And the idea would be if you're married and you're a woman, the most empowered you can be is in the grace drenched role where submission causes delight and not distress. I know the thought. This is the thought. You know, Trey said this a few weeks ago, and I loved it because it kind of gives insight to how we sermon prep. When we prep stuff like this, we think there are questions that come up in our mind that people are probably thinking. Easy for you to say, Jonathan, you're the top of the hierarchy there you're talking about. So easy for you to say women should submit to your husbands when you're the husband that's being submitted to. But can I tell you something that a godly man would think? They would live in fear of God saying, Oh, I hope I'm doing this the way you're wanting me to do this. This is not some kind of thing where fellas are going, and if you are this way, fellas, you need to repent. This is wrong. This is anti-Bible. If you are domineering your wife and you are demanding from your wife, you are not serving your wife as Christ served the church. You are not loving your wife sacrificially. You are being independent of God's submission and authority. So it's not, is it easy for me to say? It's what does the scripture say? It's not easy for me to say, because I don't want to get bum rushed by a bunch of wives after the service is over. Amen. You said submit. I'm going to submit my fist. You know, I don't want to get beat up. But I know, like, here's the thing I'm I'm I'm tongue in cheek, but I'm being for real. If there's a rub, then the rub ought to be with God and not anybody or anything else. How does God want to shape and form you? And my last point would be this is in an encouragement in submission. Now, I've had an up-close look at marriages for a long time. Um, I mean, not a super long time, but as far as like uh one of the things that happens when you start pastoring is uh people who are married come to you. Can you help us? And um and and that that's happened so many times through the years. But I've also been around married couples for a really long time. Being involved in like um vocational ministry. They're just instances where you're around married couples all the time. And and and this is the majority of what I've seen. Two different types of scenarios. It's either a woman is domineering. Or she's dominated. Until God started really breathing in this church, I had only seen marriages that were healthy outside of us. I'm so blessed today that I'm around marriages where the roles are understood. There's a godliness about how you're working things out. You may struggle with your role. Husbands sometimes feeling guilt-ridden that they're not enough, that they can't even fulfill the role of being a husband and a dad. And wives and moms feeling like everything is resting on their shoulders because their husband isn't fulfilling their responsibility as head of the house. I've watched it. I've watched the wife be dominated, and I've watched the wife be domineering. I've watched it. It seems like those are the only two places. But I want to read a scripture to you. I'm going to read Proverbs. And it's a verse of scriptures, a section of scriptures that you'll hear around Mother's Day. How many of you have heard somebody say you don't have to raise your hands? I'm going to be a
Proverbs 31 woman. Proverbs are we we a lot of churches will use this text on Mother's Day. It's supposed to be real sweet, you know. Let me read the section of scripture here. It'll be
verses 10 through 31. A little bit of meat here. An excellent wife who can find she is far more precious than jewels. The heart of her husband trusts in her. And he will have no lack of gain. She does him good and not harm all the days of her life. What a beautiful picture as y'all just got started out too. You know what I mean? Like I'm not Brooks not running around going, I won't do what I want, but I mean, like, what a beautiful picture. You're a strong woman. But I want you to hear, I want you to hear these words. This is how God wants you to be. She does good, does him good and not harm all the days of her life. She seeks wool and flax and works willingly willing hands. She is like the ships of the merchant. She brings her food from afar. She rises while it is yet night and provides food for her household and portions for her maidens. You say, You just said we're not supposed to be Susie homemakers. This is speaking of her generosity. She goes to extreme lengths to be generous. She considers a field and she buys it. She's a businesswoman. Wait a minute. No, no, no, no. You're supposed to be cooking. You're supposed to be at the house cleaning. No, no. She's industrious. You see, the Bible does not preach a little sissy woman. They can't do anything. She's not allowed to think. She's not allowed to go outside. She's not allowed to do anything except for her husband sins. I want to tell you something. There's a lie in the church that says the scriptures say that women should be a doormat and they should be dominated. That is not what the scriptures say. Let me keep reading. Come on, ladies. I want you. You should be amening right here. I'm talking to you. There we go. Come on, Maritza. I heard that Cuban Amen over there. She said, Amen. All right. With the fruit of her hands, she plants a vineyard. She dresses herself with strength and makes her arms strong. Come on, my ladies in the house that like to work out every once in a while. Come on. There we go. She's strong. She perceives that her merchandise is profitable. Her lamp does not go out at night. She puts her hands to the distaff and Her hands hold the spindle. That means she again she's industrious, she's working with her hands. She opens her hand to the poor and she reaches her hands out to the needy. She is not afraid of snow for her household, for her household are clothed in scarlet. What a prophetic picture that they're not only clothed, but they're clothed as this New Testament brings us. They're clothed with Christ. Wives, you are clothing as a garment, Christ's nature over your family and over your husband. You're pleading the blood of Jesus over your husbands. My God, we need strong women in the body of Christ who know how God has made them to be. Because if they don't do it, it's not going to get done. You have a role.
She makes bed coverings for herself. Her clothing is fine linen and purple Quoting Proverbs 31:22. Her husband is known in the gates when he sits among the elders of the land. She makes linen garments and sells them. She delivers sashes to the merchant. Strength and dignity are her clothing. And she laughs at the time to come. She opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue. She looks well to the ways of her household. She and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children rise up and call her blessed. Her husband also, and he praises her. Many women have done excellently. But you surpass them all. Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain. But a woman who fears the Lord, you submit as unto the Lord. As far as I'm concerned, see Christ in your husband, not your husband. Because that's who you're submitted to. Give her the fruit of her hands and let her works praise her in the gates. Now, my thought is an
Ephesians 5 woman is a
Proverbs 31 woman. They're not two different people. If you're an
Ephesians 5 woman, you are a
Proverbs 31 woman. If you're a
Proverbs 31 woman, you're an
Ephesians 5 woman. As we close, I think there are probably many of you that this is the way you desire to live, but there might be in here today. Someone who really struggles with this, and this is a problem. Maybe you have been abused in a previous marriage. Man, our hearts feel for you because that person did not represent Christ well for you. And can we just stop for a second? And I would love to just pray over that. And I'll close after this. But Father, right now, in the name of Jesus, by the power of the Holy Spirit. Come to every woman who has been hurt by what should have been a picture of Christ. Laura, she has been caused great damage. She was not protected. She was not praised by her husband. She didn't come away feeling strength and empowerment. She came away feeling defeated and weak. Holy Spirit, you're the only one that I know that can do this. But would you go now? To every one of those moments, and would you begin the process of healing that heart? Not so we can get to, okay, now they can submit. No, no, no. I praise so that they can get a hold of you. Father, I pray so that they can get in your presence again in a way where there's no more issue. Because Father, healing doesn't start with a new man, it starts with the man, Jesus Christ. It starts with your forgiveness and your tenderness and your gentleness and your love. Father, would you heal? Would you begin that process even now? In Jesus' name. If you find that you're a wife who is consistently distressed every time your husband begins to lead, or those of you that have become even apathetic towards your husband because they're not leading to the way you feel that they should be, this is what I want you to do. And I'm saying this as tenderly as I can. What you need more than anything is brokenness that can only come from God. Me, I can't force you to these things. I'm not even trying. I just want you to consider the word. Some of you in here, you really like you have a large distrust of men in general. Maybe you're not married. That's why God brings us into the church, too. Fellas, you don't know that your example of godliness, what it might be helping a woman in this church with. You just don't know. If you're finding that you're you're stubborn, if you're finding that you're resistant, if you're finding that you have pride, if you're finding fear or worry, I want to, again, I want to say this as tenderly as I can. These are trademark signs, not of an unwillingness just to submit, but an unwillingness to trust God in your marriage. God can take care of you if you don't feel like your husband's doing a great job at it right now. And I hear the voice. Well, what am I supposed to do? Just sit around. No, no, no. Seek God. Clothe your husband with prayers of Christ. Clothe your husband. Cloth him as your Humble and and as you intercede for him and as you serve him, loving him, just as you would serve Christ, if Christ came into your home and sat at your table, if Christ came, Jesus says, if you've done it unto these, you've done it unto me. And I hear the other voice that says, But Jonathan, that's so unfair. I I hear you. I hear you. But I say again, this is as gentle and as tender as I can. Could you endure what is not fair? For the sake of being obedient to what God has called you to. That is the rub that every one of us faces when it comes to our relationship with Jesus, not just marriages. I understand this is a very sensitive thing. And if anything, I'm overly sensitive about a lot of things. But if that's you, I just want to challenge you. Come to the Lord, seek brokenness. David wrote in the Psalms a contrite heart, a broken spirit, you will not refuse. In other words, when you come into places of brokenness, that's where God meets you. Submit your marriage. Husbands, submit your husband, your marriage to the Lord. And all these things, what would be beautiful is that when people look at your marriage, they see Christ. They see Christ in his church. They see the love of God and they see the willingness to not just be served, but to serve. Amen. Well, let me pray to close us and then we'll say our sending liturgy together and um. Well, we've been doing lately is we leave the front area open and we try to protect it. We have got a lot of kids here, and we thank God for that. But as we dismiss in a second, if you need prayer, we're gonna try to protect this front area for you. We'll have our leaders back over there. If you just need a moment, uh these wine kneeling benches. Paul said in Ephesians, he said, For this reason I bow my knee. And a few years ago, we were meeting at a Methodist church down the road. We were using their gym, and they had these little quirky kneeling benches. And I thought, that's so weird. That's so strange. Like I've been a part of a Catholic funeral, and I stand up back down, and I've been a part of a Methodist service, and I've seen people go up to the front and just kneel down, and I thought, so strange. And then I read that passage. For this reason, I bow my knee. And we don't bow anymore. Probably a problem with our culture is we don't bow to those that we think are of more significance than us. Do we? In fact, we would find that offensive. I see those kneeling benches as an invitation to constantly remind myself that at one point in human history, every knee will bow. To me, those kneeling benches represent a place of surrender and humility. Maybe you need that. I have found from time to time in prayer, those kneeling benches come in handy to do something physical that helps me and strengthens me in a place spiritually. So if you're just ever wondering why the kneeling benches, that's kind of why. Okay. But if you need that time after we uh do our ascending liturgy, please, please get a time of prayer. We gather in the house of God for spiritual things. This is not an item on your schedule and an agenda, just like Matt was praying. If you need time with the Lord, please. Spend time with him as we close. Father, thank you for our time together. I thank you for this word that ultimately reaches beyond the marriage and in just our life with Christ. Help us to be people who are people under authority. Every person, every man, woman, and child. God help this church to better understand authority and submission so that we can represent you well in the culture as counteracting all that our culture may try to feed us. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen. Well, stand to your feet if you're able. Our sending liturgy, just a part along with our liturgies, is just an opportunity to confess something, hopefully to even motivate you as you leave here. We're sending you. God is sending you. So as we read this together, we make it a prayer and confession as to what we want to see happening in our lives for the rest of the week. So let's read this together. We are not leaving this place. We are being sent. We are obeying the command of our Lord to go. So send us, Lord, to find you in secret in prayer and devotion. To love and care for our families, to strengthen and encourage our brothers and sisters in Christ, to faithfully work as unto the Lord in the marketplace and home, to wisely steward all you have given us, to recognize our place and ability in our community, to witness of your goodness and grace to neighbors and nations. Send us now in your presence and power. Amen. You are dismissed.
